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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/28/2008 12:34:07 AM
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locomom
Posts: 216
Joined: 4/15/2005
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Worst: My dd at age 8 had become seriously depressed to the point of talking about and planning suicide. The cause was a combination of medications along with have a doctor deny the reality of the emotional adverse reactions caused by some meds. My father-in-law offered to have my daughter live with them and fix her problems by sending her to public school. Having someone offer to take my daughter from me when we really needed some support and prayer really hurt.
Best: My husband's extended family consists of a lot of public school teachers. So our decision to homeschool wasn't popular. After about five or six years of homeschooling my mil, who was a public school teacher for 20 years, admitted to having had some serious doubts about our choice. then she said that she see what a difference it had made in Kathryn because she was so nice and she knew so much more. This was in comparison to some of her cousins.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/28/2008 1:38:24 AM
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sen10tious
Posts: 349
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I have had a lot of positive remarks over the years, many of them from ps teachers. The compliments that I value the most are from my grown (and independent) children. The best positive remark I ever received from a totally clueless person was, "You're so lucky your kids get along so well."
The most negative remark doesn't translate into print very well. It was: "Oh." You would have had to have been there to see the little gears turning inside the head and the flames smoldering behind the eyes.
The most negative remark that looks absolutely horrible in print (but didn't really bother us because it was so over-the-top foolish) was actually said to my children: "The best thing that could happen to you would be to have your mother go away to jail for a long time."
... It bothered me that this man would try to scare children like that though, so I asked God to put those words into his record for Judgment Day. Boy, is that guy going to be surprised when he is judged to be a fool!
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/28/2008 2:35:30 AM
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Bagel
Posts: 314
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From: Oregon
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quote:
"The best thing that could happen to you would be to have your mother go away to jail for a long time."
What an absurd thing to say to children!
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Bagel Lisa
check out my blog at http://bagelslifehomeschool.blogspot.com/
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 8/28/2008 1:10:31 PM
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needwisdom
Posts: 3
Joined: 10/4/2005
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My wife and I have heard the usual socialization argument but these are the ones that make us laugh:
"You're not smart enough"
"You don't have enough time to homeschool your children."
Funny, we both went through public school systems. My wife works from home.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/5/2008 11:35:03 AM
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stateofgrace
Posts: 2004
Joined: 4/12/2005
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You'd think that with a son and DIL that have successfully homeschooled 5 daughters (well, still in process with most of them, but they've done well), my MIL would be a little more tolerant of the idea. But when DH let slip to her recently that we are considering (yes, simply considering) homeschooling, distance education, a hybrid of hs/private school or hs/dual college credit classes for our younger DD next year, she expressed her complete lack of understanding why in the world we and our daughter would even find that appealing!!!! And she didn't understand how a 16 yo could study at home without constant supervision!
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/5/2008 12:55:07 PM
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Mom24Blessings
Posts: 35
Joined: 9/2/2008
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Sadly, my father in law (a retired professor) said They are concerned about Alex, because he seems very hyper, doesn't listen very well and they worry that if he is not in a social setting in school he will not do well.
They couldn't believe he didn't know how to tie his shoes at 4 years old, the shame!!!
So my husband went on to give him facts regarding home schooled children and also the reasons why we will home school, how our Christian beliefs come in to play with that, and how we don't want the government teaching him what THEY want him to know and not to know...
And my father in law said 'Don't hand me that Christian ****'...
That made for a very tense visit.
Then we emailed them pictures of Alex in his 'class room' aka our dining room, all the great posters we put up for him, resources, maps, etc... We were so thrilled with the way we transformed it into a great learning place for him.
So my mother in law emailed me back saying, 'before you know, the baby will be wanting to 'play school' also'.
Oh, I had to bite my tongue and just delete the email, because we are in no way 'playing' school. And even if we were, he'd still learn better!!!
Years ago, when I homeschooled my oldest for a year when he was in 5th grade,
my parents yelled at me...'What are you ... in a CULT?'..... 'What are you....AMISH?'
They've since opened up about homeschooling, but I remember those remarks, they hurt.
_____________________________
My Four Blessings....
Benjamin, 16
Megan, 12
Alexandre, 5
Emilienne, 1
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/5/2008 1:24:32 PM
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judii1
Posts: 353
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Frozen Thumb of MI!
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quote:
Sadly, my father in law (a retired professor) said They are concerned about Alex, because he seems very hyper, doesn't listen very well and they worry that if he is not in a social setting in school he will not do well.
They couldn't believe he didn't know how to tie his shoes at 4 years old, the shame!!!
My grandson goes to ps and is hyper. The school secretary handed my daughter a paper to take to the family doctor to see if he needed medication! My daughter handed it back to the secretary and told her if his psychologist thought he needed medication, he would prescribe it for him.
quote:
So my mother in law emailed me back saying, 'before you know, the baby will be wanting to 'play school' also'.
Dh would tell me that I was "playing school" with Ds, sometimes. He was right!! While we were "playing" in the backyard, we covered almost a whole year of 3rd grade science. 
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/5/2008 1:31:18 PM
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peculiar_lady2
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quote:
Then we emailed them pictures of Alex in his 'class room' aka our dining room, all the great posters we put up for him, resources, maps, etc... We were so thrilled with the way we transformed it into a great learning place for him.
So my mother in law emailed me back saying, 'before you know, the baby will be wanting to 'play school' also'.
Oh, I had to bite my tongue and just delete the email, because we are in no way 'playing' school. And even if we were, he'd still learn better!!!  ...ok seriously I don't get that kind of attitude. What's wrong with playing ANYTHING? including school!!!!! Playing helps kids learn to deal with real life issues and helps them work through their own reactions to things. It teaches them better then most other method, which is WHY parents, day cares, and school class rooms USE play as a teaching tool!!!!! My kids "play" with cooking stuff, they "play" with dolls, they "play" with cars, etc...so what's wrong with "playing" school!!!! It's a real life situation, and I don't know about your kids, but my kids tend to want to "play" real life situations. That's how they learn to deal with those situations when they come up in real life for real!!!! UUUUGGGGGHHHHHH...some people!!!!!
btw, my 7yo still can't tie...we buy velcro shoes...lol. She knows how to tie a knot in the trash bag when she empties the bathroom trash can, but does not have any clue yet about bows. I am waiting til she shows interests in it because I was getting frustrated trying to teach her...no point in that!!!
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/10/2008 4:38:41 PM
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lifeisgoodwgod
Posts: 54
Joined: 1/28/2006
From: Western NC
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So funny. Recently our public schools began their school year. My 14 yr old dd and I were checking out at Walmart. My dd went over to Subway to get an ICEE and I had to yell to her to go to the check out line instead of getting in the sandwich line. The check out lady (who was quite heavy and not well kempt(?)) asked if she enjoyed school this year and I said YES. She wanted to know where she went and I said she was homeschooled. She then went on to quiz me about whether or not she got any excercise. What is that about? I should have responded with how much excercise does She get. I don't really know if people know what to think about us weirdos. I think my response surprised me more than the question. I defended her "physical education" schedule instead of something intelligent. And then there is the sister in law...who was a school nurse at public school for many years. You would think she of all people could see the problems with public school, but she has bitten into the liberal point of view. She just keeps saying "whatever floats your boat". What is that about?
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/10/2008 5:12:17 PM
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jennycarr
Posts: 2
Joined: 9/10/2008
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we live in the u.k and our husbands family said we were cruel.
However when my children tell others they are home schooled, other children think it is cool and wish they were.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/22/2008 12:26:48 PM
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goodnsimple
Posts: 44
Joined: 7/28/2008
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I find the most negative things are said by the devil in my very own head.
Most people I have run across have been pretty supportive. But they assume the school gives us the curriculum. They are shocked that we don't have to "prove" or get "approval" for what we do.
I just say, you know I have taken him out of school because it was not working for him...why would I do it the same way at home?
My parents are not gung ho, but they are not against it either. I think this winter, when they are here, they will see what a difference it makes and be completely on board.
My mother in law has been here for the agony so, even though she is not a hs fan in general, she is supportive of it for ds.
ds8 told his dad this morning he wants to hs too. He says the work is tooooo easy. and he is bored. but he worries he might be bored with hs too.
He is more arguementative than ds11, so I am not sure I am up for both of them.
BUT... we will consider it.
How difficult would it be, when ds8 is probably going to be passing ds11 on many fronts here soon? How do you protect ds11's self esteem. That is one of the reasons I kept ds8 in ps. so the whole thing is less obvious.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/22/2008 12:31:01 PM
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Jenny-Fair
Posts: 6284
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From: WA
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Keeping a gifted child in PS is going to hold him back. Holding back one child is no better than failing to protect the self-esteem of the other. In both cases you are doing wrong to your child.
I think the answer would lie in giving the 11 yo child outlets for his natural talents (everyone has some), so that he can feel confident and gifted in something. And, of course, explaining that God made everyone different, and we all have different gifts, and it's how we use them that matters.
I was a bored child in PS and it's an awful experience.
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Ziva: It is possible. I do not remember all their names.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/22/2008 3:20:30 PM
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cindybode
Posts: 1546
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From: Northwest PA
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My 11 yo is ahead of my 14 yo in many things. It's really not a big deal. My kids have been raised to believe that God makes everybody's brain different, and if my 11 yo does start feeling a little too good about himself he is reminded of all the things his brother is good at that he is not (and there are many). As Jen said, finding and encouraging your 11 yo's natural talents will go a long way towards making him feel good about himself. Just keep an eye on your 8 yo and let him know that little digs about his brother's lack of ability in certain areas won't be tolerated.
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If you lock in any creature, from rats to chickens to pigs to people, 10 to 30 or more in a box and force feed them you'll create little monsters. Confinement Education School Operations (CESOs) just don't compare to naturally pastured free-ranged kids.
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 9/22/2008 3:33:12 PM
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bzirk
Posts: 2915
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From: Where the deer and antelope play
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My kids have been all over the map on which subjects they're ahead and behind. I had a girl who was years ahead of her age group when it came to reading and writing. But in math it was a totally different story. Today, she is getting her math course in college out of the way and then not looking back. As for her writing ability, she has just started publishing a bi-monthly magazine for our area of Colorado. I'm really proud of her, but I gotta tell you that she has to check and recheck and maybe let someone else check her account figures to make sure she knows how much money she has or needs to collect. 
OTOH, I have a son who struggles with reading and would rather be beat with a big stick than write a paper. Oh, I so relate. I HATED writing when I was a kid. It was very hard for me. Anyway, my son is so good in math it's scary at times. He also has a really good head for business. Since his written communications are not as great, I don't know what would have happened to him in a traditional school. Frankly, I think he would have been overlooked.
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may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13
Great quote: I just ain't God and don't know it all. -- SonInMe1
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 10/6/2008 11:05:22 PM
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Homegrownkids
Posts: 1164
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This has been nice reading all the comments. I applaud those that have stuck with homeschooling when their own family/parents, relatives have given you such a hard time!!
Here is a spin off to this thread. Do your children ever feel like "outsiders" because they are homeschooled and hear some of these comments?
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God heals!
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 10/7/2008 1:34:51 PM
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Homegrownkids
Posts: 1164
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Lately, I've been hearing the S.School teacher say to my children.... "Oh, you're homeschooled".... kinda like my kids don't count, or they aren't the same as the other S.School kids. I don't know if this is a good thing, or a bad thing. I am taking it like a bad thing. Sometimes the minor stuff is more irritating then when someone makes a big comment.
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www.caringbridge.org/visit/pray4noah
God heals!
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RE: Most negative, most positive remarks? - 10/13/2008 2:11:48 AM
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lightshineon
Posts: 3549
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Funny, I have not really had comments either way. The only thing even kind of negative is a co-worker, a good Christian woman, who always wants me to enroll my child in her churches private school.
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Remember, whenever you have pearls, there are always plenty of pigs nearby who would be glad to step on them.
F.T., 2007
Be sure you vote for those, whose views you want your children to emulate.
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